tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7272708354546088921.post2273210293250991673..comments2023-10-12T15:22:50.190+05:30Comments on Coffee Beans & Dry Flowers...: The Magic of Winter...The Wandering Gypsyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05499288251026874804noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7272708354546088921.post-16405409598778574842009-02-18T07:56:00.000+05:302009-02-18T07:56:00.000+05:30This is pretty good. I like some of the images. I ...This is pretty good. I like some of the images. I think it could do with a little polish to remove the excessive gerunds.<BR/><BR/>For example, instead of "Flocks of birds flying in the skies above / and some staying behind to face tough days" you could easy change it to "Flocks of birds fly.../ and some stay behind."<BR/><BR/>Gerunds, as a rule, are like adverbs: they're neutral sounds that don't add to the music of the poem. Almost any poem can be improved by removing gerunds and adverbs.<BR/><BR/>Another example:<BR/><BR/>"The world wears a glittering veil" could be rewritten as "The world is veiled in glitter" or even merely, "The world glitters."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7272708354546088921.post-91975322263770908002008-12-17T03:07:00.000+05:302008-12-17T03:07:00.000+05:30Lovely imagery, I love the "somnolent moon"Lovely imagery, I love the "somnolent moon"Beatrice Vhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09492224274542764248noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7272708354546088921.post-58036908903929067202008-12-16T19:40:00.000+05:302008-12-16T19:40:00.000+05:30first time here... and liked it...firstly, nice na...first time here... and liked it...<BR/>firstly, nice name of blog and good template...!! :)<BR/><BR/>and a beautiful piece with the wonders of winter... could imagine it nicely and very beautifully written...!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7272708354546088921.post-84944631024201476972008-12-16T19:29:00.000+05:302008-12-16T19:29:00.000+05:30Beautiful and gentle...I love winter, and u've bro...Beautiful and gentle...<BR/>I love winter, and u've brought out the magic of winter so well here!Arpita Royhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10801250860794567485noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7272708354546088921.post-62452734523088526422008-12-16T19:26:00.000+05:302008-12-16T19:26:00.000+05:30ah! you have made winter a sadness in the end for ...ah! you have made winter a sadness in the end for after sad comes cheer and so after winter comes spring!<BR/><BR/>then again you have said so much about its beauty! i love winters!Nikhil Ranbhisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07752913238582879950noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7272708354546088921.post-46216027836192407682008-12-16T19:24:00.000+05:302008-12-16T19:24:00.000+05:30Though i am not a fan of winter, u made me yearn f...Though i am not a fan of winter, u made me yearn for it now. magical and beautiful images its a treat reading it. Goodwork Wandering gypsy!Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16928232818224536944noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7272708354546088921.post-45414339533448226832008-12-16T19:17:00.000+05:302008-12-16T19:17:00.000+05:30I see your imagery brushing strokes of perfection....I see your imagery brushing strokes of perfection. I am still always unable to comprehend just how unique each and every one of your lines, they all portray nature in a most revolving manner. This poem does strike me as beautifully executed and very exquisitely penned down...<BR/><BR/>and I do so immensely love perusing these wonderful writes of yours... A poetic fan of yours you have made me....!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11488955460683659478noreply@blogger.com